Post-Pandemic Professional Development Pantoum
My friend, the Poet texts me from the gym —
We’re starting.
I am late as usual.
He texts again — Opposite the stage.
We’re starting
to identify as senior faculty
so we sit opposite the stage
in the far back bleacher.
I sit with senior faculty
between the Gallery Director and Speech Professor
in the far back bleacher.
We cannot read the print on the PowerPoint.
I sit between the Gallery Director and Speech Professor.
They both have Ph.D.’s
but cannot read the print on the PowerPoint
for the panel presentation.
They both have Ph.D.’s
in Art History and Speech Communication.
The panel presentation
includes the Provost and some Vice Presidents.
Art History and Communication
got put into the same division
by the Provost and some Vice Presidents
during lockdown.
When they got put into the same division
we heard about the reorganization in Zoom
during lockdown.
Now, though, we’re all back together in the gym.
We heard about the reorganization in Zoom
when the Speech Professor was president of the faculty union.
But today, we’re all back together in the gym.
The Speech Professor is wearing half a baseball uniform — the white pants and shoes
and has grown a beard since he’s no longer president of the faculty union.
The Gallery Director says my earrings are nice. They’re called Butterfly Dreams.
The Speech Professor is wearing half a baseball uniform — the white pants and shoes.
According to the Poet, my other earrings looked like the Imperial German Star.
The Gallery Director says my Butterfly Dreams earrings are nice.
I greet the Psychologist by making my hand talk like a puppet with a funny voice.
I no longer wear the earrings that the Poet compared to the Imperial German Star.
The Speech Professor whispers that management prefers to be called Leadership.
We make our hands talk like puppets with funny voices
while Leadership predicts the future of the college ten years from now.
The Speech Professor whispers that management prefers to be called Leadership.
I already know but smile and nod.
Leadership is predicting the future of the college ten years from now.
I think of flying cars and robots who teach classes,
and because I already know, I smile and nod.
In 2034 I’ll be 66.
I think of flying cars and robots who teach classes.
I ask the Speech Professor who’s speaking.
In 2034 I’ll be 66.
A Vice President says we need to make Artificial Intelligence work for us.
I ask the Speech Professor who’s speaking.
He doesn’t know.
A Vice President says we need to make Artificial Intelligence work for us.
We think he was hired during lockdown.
He doesn’t know
who we are either.
We think he was hired during lockdown.
He could be a hologram created by Artificial Intelligence.
And who are we, intruding on the colony of geese?
They hissed at me when I approached the gym.
They must think us holograms with limited intelligence.
The geese took over campus in the pandemic.
They hiss at employees approaching the gym.
They chased the Poet in the Japanese Garden.
The geese took over campus in the pandemic.
Loyal and fierce, they fight for their spot.
They chased the Poet in the Japanese Garden.
I am late as usual.
I’ve saved you a spot,
My friend, the Poet texts me from the gym.